Work It, Girl {Say Goodbye to Survival Mode}

I have been following Crystal Paine over at Money Saving Mom for a couple of years. She brings Biblical wisdom to money matters and doesn't just preach it; she lives it.

Soon after she and her husband got married, they made a vow that they would not incur any debt while he finished going to law school. Through blood, sweat, tears (mostly hers), they made it. What's more, they took their financial goals a giant leap further and vowed to pay for their house with cash. And they did it!

For a woman who not only teaches but takes her own sound advice, you really can't help but to be inspired.

Not too long ago, my friend and I were were taking a sabbatical from Facebook. I subscribe to many bloggers who are linked with others. (in)courage is one such blog. It was through this blog that I learned of Crystal's new book, Saying Goodbye to Survival Mode.

Survival Mode. 

This was a term I used with some of the ladies at work during our book study many months ago. I have felt that I am in survival mode for a long time. The problem was, I didn't know what to do about it. I felt lost, overwhelmed, and frustrated. Stuck in a rut. That was me.

When Crystal offered a 7 Day Say Goodbye to Survival Mode challenge, I signed up. (I knew I couldn't afford to buy the book, so I was very grateful that she was offering a small sampling of her wisdom.)

Each morning, I would log into my email and anxiously wait for the latest issue to arrive. I found myself drawn to what Crystal was saying. It certainly wasn't anything new. And it wasn't anything I hadn't heard before. It just clicked this time around.

For those who don't regularly follow me, this is my first year teaching. For those of you who are teaching, you know how hectic your first year can be. I have nothing to compare my first year to (obviously), but it's pretty intense. I think it's like any new job where you're getting your footing and learning. The only difference is that with teaching, you're getting your footing for the whole first year (and I've spoken to some teachers who say it's more like three years. Whew!)

I was ready for a change and I started by following what was in Crystal's 7 Day Challenge.

Then, there was a book giveaway. I was one of the lucky recipients of a free book!

I don't believe in fate. But I do believe that things happen in God's perfect timing. I believe that this book was meant to fall into my hands so that I could start making some changes. (Lord knows I have been crying out to Him for a long time!)

***A side note: I have permission from Crystal (through Amy, her assistant), to talk about Crystal's book in my blog. All the links in this post (and future posts) will link to Crystal's website. There are no affiliate links in this post. Period.  I am also offering this blog series as a self-help for me and so all of you can keep me accountable. I did not receive a free book in exchange for my opinion on the book. Instead, I wanted follow Crystal's lead. She uses her blog to update her readers about her own personal goals. (This is a blog that helps sustain her family, folks - but if she does that on a business blog, it only makes sense that I might like to try it on a personal one.)***

I look at successful people at wonder how they got their success. Were they born with it? Were they lucky? I didn't know and to be honest, people aren't always quick to share how they got where they are. (There are exceptions, of course - Crystal, for example). But because people weren't sharing and all I saw was the success (as opposed to the struggle), I came to my own conclusions.

It just happened.

Guess what?

It doesn't just happen.

Successful people work at being successful.

Who knew? I didn't.

So, how do successful people work it? They set goals that they write down and work on daily. Daily. Not once a week. Not sometimes. Every. Single. Day.

Amazing.

So, naturally, as I'm reading through Saving Goodbye to Survival Mode I'm stopping and doing the little "homework" assignments. I even found a brand name spiral notebook to take notes...and boy have I been taking notes!

I will share some of my goals a little later, but do you see that graphic at the top of this blog post? That's a small sampling of my to do list today. And while I didn't take pictures of it, I've got three things marked off of it today. (This post will make #4!)

I've never been one to use to do lists. I'll use shopping lists - they help keep me focused and stop me from spending extra money I don't have.

Do you know what a to do list does?

It keeps me focused and stops me from spending wasting time I don't have. I just came to that realization. Literally just as I was writing that sentence. But it's the truth! My to do list has kept me focused on what I need to do. I even found an online timer and set it for 30 minutes and didn't do anything but worked on the task at hand. (Crystal borrows a bit of wisdom from Marla Cilley aka FlyLady and suggests working for 15 minutes. But I knew the work I had to do could be done for longer.)

You know what I found out? The task didn't take as long as I thought it would it usually does.

Focused work gets the job done.

Who knew?

Until next time...

The Faithful One {Book Review}

The Faithful One is a modern re-telling of the story of Job. Seth Jacobs is a renowned chef who owns a chain of upscale restaurants called The Perfect Place. He is so successful that there happens to be The Perfect Place restaurants in every single state in the country. He has a beautiful wife, three successful children who are skilled in various areas. Life is good.

 

But this all changes one fateful day when he gets stuck in traffic on the way to a dinner honoring a would-be presidential candidate at one of his restaurants. Seth is thrown into a downward spiral of catastrophic events that leaves his whole picture-perfect world is shambles.

 

As he questions God about his recent lack of luck, Seth's three friends (an agnostic lawyer, a doctor and a rabbi) attempt to shed light on their theories as to why God is punishing him. Seth searches his heart and cannot see truth in his friends' theories. Instead, it takes the gentle, but strong voice of a chance meeting with a stranger that truly opens Seth's heart to take a good listen to what God is saying.

 

I snagged this book because 1) it was free and 2) the storyline was intriguing. As I began to read the book and follow along with Seth on his worst-day-in-the-history-of-worst-days day, I rolled my eyes. It sounded trite and almost comical. But when I thought about it further, I soon realized that this is how bad news is dealt to us. It is one blow after another, after another, after another until we wonder if we're KO. We're reaching for the ropes, eyes swollen shut, blood dripping onto the ring wondering how much more we can take. There are times when we just wish our opponent would take us out and we could call it quits.

 

This is how Seth Jacobs felt at his lowest of lows. And this is why I fully sympathized with him during his quest to find answers to seemingly lost questions.

 

If you are familiar with Job in the Bible, then you can probably guess how Seth's journey ends, but Michele Chynoweth puts just enough of a modern spin that you can still be pleasantly surprised by the end. Or if you're like me, you can struggle with the decisions he makes and wonder, if faced with the same set of circumstances, would you make the same choices?

 

Until next time...

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Facebook Fast Update

It has been 24 days since I have stepped away from Facebook. How am I doing?

Pretty darned good!

I have discovered that I don't miss Facebook as much as I thought I would. I do miss the updates, though. At work, while walking down the halls, I'll hear teachers ask one another, "Did you see [fill in the blank] on Facebook?"

When they ask me, I have to tell them honestly, "Nope."

Since stepping away from Facebook, I've had to rely on getting my information the old fashioned way - word of mouth.

So, naturally, I am completely out of the loop.

This doesn't bother me as much as you might think, except when I go to church on Sunday and discover that someone is sick or someone has died and I don't know because I don't follow the news on Facebook. Then, I look a little insensitive when I ask what I've missed.

Overall, however, I'm doing okay without Facebook.

And for some reading this, you might be thinking, "What's the big deal? So you step away from Facebook for awhile. It's not that hard; just turn off your computer."

And to you I would say, "You are absolutely correct. It is as simple as that."

But I needed to do this to realign my priorities.

I guess I haven't stepped completely away from social media. I have browsed Instagram (it's quick and easy and virtually impossible to spend more than a few minutes on it a day when you just follow friends). And there have been times when I've shared on Facebook what I post to Instragram. But, if someone doesn't physically comment or like on Instagram, I don't see it.

So who knows all the goodies I'm missing out on. Facebook sends me an email every single day saying I have 35 messages and over 99 notifications. Friends and family have even tagged me (I get email notifications about that because I sensor anything that gets tagged on my page). But I have no clue what anyone has to say - good or bad. Someone could be blessing me out or encouraging me or congratulating me. I honestly have no clue.

Oddly enough, I'm okay about it all.

So, what I have been doing during these past three weeks:

• Catching up on some Bible reading: it's amazing the truths I've been able to uncover
• Keeping in touch with close family and friends via email and text
• Connecting with women from my church (although I would do this anyway, it's kind of nice to get information face-to-face rather than through a social media platform
• Running! Me, who swore she would never run. I'm training with The Boy using a Couch to 5K program. My school is hosting a Tiger Trot on March 8th. I will definitely be trotting (probably at a very slow pace, but I'll be there). Running is me bungee jumping out of my comfort zone. It's something I've never done and it goes hand-in-hand with my Bible study: Disciplines of a Godly Woman. What's more disciplined than training for a run (even if it is just 3 miles?)
• Losing weight! As of this morning, I am officially losing new weight. What I mean is that I weigh exactly what I weighed when I started working this August. What's more, I am only ten pounds from goal! I think that's pretty awesome, in and of itself. I've never reached this point before. It's taken me five years to get this far (let's say I've done a lot of do-overs!)

So, next Saturday, I can officially log into Facebook (did I mention Pinterest put me into protective mode? I've completely freaked out all of my social media sites!) Am I counting down? I can honestly say I am not. In fact, a friend who inspired me to do the fast (although she was doing it for 21 days) reminded me that she was able to go on today. By the way, she was completely unimpressed with what she saw.)

What now? Well, I can tell you that after "detoxing" from Facebook for a month, it'd be counter productive to go back to my old ways. It would be like me getting to my goal weight, only to resume the way of eating that got to me to my heaviest in my first place. (That was almost 200 lbs, by the way) Why would I do that?

However, when you give something up, you have to replace it with something (those quitting smoking chew gum - or eat; those wanting to lose weight substitute healthier snack options; those who want to stop drinking choose other activities). Why? Because if you don't have something to replace the behavior you want to stop/reduce/eliminate, it's going to come back (sometimes with a vengeance).

So what is my replacement activity?

Writing.

Looking back at old blog posts, some of them were pretty good. Others, particularly those I did while I was in school and writing research papers on a weekly basis, were pretty bad. But writing is an art that must be practiced. Back when my posts weren't too bad, I was writing more (journaling, mainly). Now - not so much. Furthermore, Facebook is getting all my wit, sarcasm, and "good stuff". No more. I'd rather put it into blogging.

Besides, I need something to wind down my days. Being productive is a whole lot better than being a bump on a log - wouldn't you agree?

Until next time...

First Grade in Finland: Every Day is a Half-Day - Taught by Finland

First Grade in Finland: Every Day is a Half-Day - Taught by Finland

 This is an interesting article comparing the typical school day of American first graders and first graders in Finland. The differences (and the author's justifications for those differences as he views them as an Ameican teacher teaching within the Finnish school system) are quite profound. 



Perhaps the United States *does* have it backwards. Perhaps less really is more?

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Music Video "He's Always Been Faithful To Me"

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Why I'm Choosing to Quit Facebook for 31 Days

Isaiah 55:2

Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)

2 Why waste your money on something that is not real food?
    Why should you work for something that does not really satisfy you?
Listen closely to me, and you will eat what is good.
    You will enjoy the food that satisfies your soul.

Some things that are good (or at least benign) for some people, are bad (or at least not the best choice) for others.

• Alcohol in moderation is fine for most, but not to an alcoholic
• Food is moderation is fine for most, but not to an overeater
• Social media is fine for most, but not for me

Romans 7:13

New King James Version (NKJV)

13 Has then what is good become death to me? Certainly not! But sin, that it might appear sin, was producing death in me through what is good, so that sin through the commandment might become exceedingly sinful.

About three months ago, I heard my pastor preach a message. To be honest, I don't even remember what it was about. What I do remember, however, was a small whisper. This whisper told me that Facebook was taking over my life. Not a day goes by that I do not check status updates, post pictures, read articles posted by others and post a few of my own.

As a whole, my Facebook experience isn't bad. I don't curse or start drama. I try to only post positive and uplifting things. I don't even get sucked into the political ramblings from my conservative and liberal friends! 

However, when I think, "This is really awesome! I need to post this on Facebook!", something has to give.

The time for me, is now.

Romans 12:2

Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)

2 Don’t change yourselves to be like the people of this world, but let God change you inside with a new way of thinking. Then you will be able to understand and accept what God wants for you. You will be able to know what is good and pleasing to him and what is perfect.

I am doing it for spiritual reasons - I feel I need to spend more time in the Word. I also feel that a lot of what I've taken in when I read Facebook posts has altered my perception of life. Facebook, Pinterest, and even Instagram only gives us snapshots of people's lives - usually the good. The highlight reels, if you will. And when comparing someone else's really good moments to your okay moments has you wondering about your okay moments, it's time to step away for a spell.

I wanted to update everyone on what I was doing. Not to brag, but to make everyone aware. Even The Man Beast joked when I told him what I was doing, "Make sure to tell everyone what you're doing so they don't think you're dead!"

The next 31 days will likely be a challenge for me. I'll be starting my low-carb way of eating on January 1st and Facebook was my primary means of keeping everyone updated on my progress. Everyone's support helped me keep going when it got hard and frustrating.

But this is another point to my quitting Facebook for a month - I've completely lost touch with real friends. It's easier to have a conversation via Facebook (or text) than actually pick up the phone and talk with someone or agree to meet up and have a real face-to-face conversation. I know everyone on Facebook and many friends I see at least on a weekly basis, but I know more about them thanks to their status updates than what they've actually told me in person.

This makes me incredibly sad. The art of true conversation has been lost.

I want to rekindle it.

So, there you have it - my reasons for quitting Facebook. 

What will I do February 1st? I don't know yet. I'm going to enjoy this process and see where I am. I hope to learn a lot about myself during the next month as well as re-kindle real friendships that happen away from a computer screen. I also pray that God reveals a truth (or several) for me as I study the Word.

I'll see you in a month!

Until next time... 

Why I'm Thankful for a Little Turkey

Thanksgiving is just two, short days away and it will just be the four of us this year. I'm slightly bummed that schedules aren't working out quite like planned, but I'm thankful none the less. I have a turkey defrosting in my refrigerator and the Man Beast and I have a menu planned out, which we will begin preparing for tomorrow.

Every year, I reflect on how thankful I actually am for what my family and I have. Everyone does it, but I come from a different place that helps me appreciate my blessings so much more.

Several years ago, I wrote a three part series chronicling a very dark period, early on in my marriage.  You may read it in detail by clicking here, here, and here. Warning: It's raw, but every bit of it is true.), but I'll give you the highlights.

The Man Beast, The Boy and I were homeless.

Until you don't have a place to call your own (even if it's a rental), you really don't know that feeling of not having any place to go. It's a horrible, lost feeling. And it is one that feels as raw today as I write about it as it did 14 years ago when I experienced it.

 

This year has had it's own set of challenges, but even with the uncertainty of everything that my family is enduring this year, I can be thankful for the following:

 

- A roof over my head

- A steady income

- Food in my refrigerator

 

These are things that everyone is thankful for, but I can be thankful for the simple fact that there was a time that I didn't have any of these things.

 

As we enter the holiday season and you pass a Red Bucket, please take a few seconds to place a donation in. I am living proof that the Salvation Army does help those in need. I challenge you to put a donation in the bucket every time you pass a bell ringer. If everyone did this, even small donations add up.

 

 

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